Category Archives: Christianity

Just Pause for a While

I was in the car, a song in the radio was playing and I realized something.

“Sometimes you just have to pause for a while and listen to what God is telling you.”

And you realized that life isn’t about us. It’s truly all about Him. I still remember the days way back in the Philippines 🇵🇭 where I was so into knowing Him more, wanting to go deeper and deeper. Like I don’t care about anything else, just “give me Jesus”

I was passionate in serving Him. All I care is doing what He wants me to do. I do care for people to know Him and experience the love of God. But it’s different, now. I admit. People nowadays are so busy in their lives -job, career, love life, business, studies etc. Oh wait!…plus social media.

It does take over our lives. Pre-occupied with so many things and sadly, we don’t think about Him all the time. Ouch!

We have to pause and go back to your first love. The song lyric says

“… You can have all in this world, just give me Jesus”

I miss HIM. And I miss myself going deep to His presence. I longed for it everyday. I remember when I used to sing praises to Him, worship Him every single day. The best place I’ve ever been – in HIS presence. Where there is no doubt and fear there, only joy and peace and LOVE. That’s where we supposed to be. Even in the midst of darkness, being with HIM is just wonderful.

God never leaves us, that’s the truth. The challenge is.. to make room for HIM, to give time for Him no matter how busy we are. 

It is important to pause for a while and think about our priorities. Life on earth is just short, we are just passing by.  This is not our home. Make room for what is important, know HIM deeper. 

Just one of my favorite worship songs say “The more I seek you, the more I find you. The more I find you, the more I love you”

God’s love is the best LOVE among any other love in this world. So, loving HIM is the best decision we could ever make. 

Pause and think about HIM. HE thinks about us all the time.

O God! I just miss you. I apologize for not making you my priority. I will make it up to you. Thank you for being patient with me.


I’m back

Depression isn’t easy.

I remember the days when I used to suffer from it. I had symptoms but no one notices, I had a smile on my face every time they see me but they didn’t know I was dying inside. I had attempts and thoughts of ending my….. I don’t even want to say it… suicide. Oh well! What is it to be shy about? People judges you, they know you are a Christian and they thought you can’t experience such things. But let me tell you this, Christians are humans. No matter how we try to do God’s will in our lives, we all have seasons and situations. We have feelings, we struggle too. Maybe the only difference is… we admit that we need JESUS. Whether you are a believer or not, we do all struggle.

God healed me. It took me long years. Yes, long years. Since I arrived here in Aruba, my life changed. I had to face the changes instantly. And I think I am one of the people who can’t just adopt quickly. I have to take my time, people shouldn’t force me. What happened is… people compare their situation to mine. That just because they experience the same hardship, I should also, adopt it quickly. Honestly, it was not easy for me but I tried and I kept moving.

There were times when I just simply want to go back to my own country, but I had to ask God if that’s what He also wants. I grew up with the heart wanting to do what God wants in my life. I failed Him many times and that’s just part of my journey. I learned from my disobedience and stubbornness. But I do believe in Him. He knows what He is doing and He is so good at it. Sometimes we don’t understand His plans are, but we just have to trust that He loves us.

The more I asked him “Why”? Why am I still here?” the more I experienced difficulties during those years. Depression kicks in. I wanted to do my own way, I wanted to control what’s going to happen in my life. I wanted things to happen the way I pictured them. But didn’t happen at all. I started to look down on myself, I have begun to hate myself, unknowingly I am hurting other people too. My behavior changed. And even I tried to look at good things at myself and at others, I failed and ended up becoming negative and isolating myself to others even to those who love me as I am. People didn’t see that. But I noticed it. I didn’t like it. I don’t like to dislike people just because they didn’t match to my personality.

To make it short, I got up and tried to rise up again. It’s a process. I had to make a planner list down I have to do the whole day so I can stay productive. Because when you’re depressed, you don’t want to do anything. You work but just because you need to but your heart isn’t there, your mind isn’t there. You only think about the negatives. You cry so much over nothing. You got mad over nothing. There is no life.

Reading the WORD, having quiet time and worshiping HIm even I was hurting was my ways of dealing with it. I ran to the ONE who created me. I ran to the ONE who writes down my story. He knows how to handle it. He knows me from the inside out. I do not have to worry because even I look at myself weak, even I look down on myself, He sees me beautiful, He sees me righteous and lovely. He never judges me. He loves me. That’s the truth. I clung to that. I held on to that.

Do not get me wrong for saying I look down on myself. People will say, you shouldn’t because God created you. He made you wonderfully and beautifully. Some will ask “Don’t you believe that?” You should, because you are a Christian. And I will say it again, I am human and I can still feel any feelings such as sadness, anger, frustrations, and depression. What I believe — we all have different situations and if we let Him mold us during the process, you will get out from it stronger. And the more you will know that HE is real. When you can’t do anything but trust Him. People will judge you and won’t understand what you are going through, but HIM. He knows everything and He knows me so well.

Everything happens for a reason and that is a truth.

If I will look back now, all I can say is “Thank you, Lord” If it wasn’t for Him, I don’t know where I am now. And I won’t be ashamed to tell my story and reveals God’s glory.

When I say I am back, it doesn’t only mean that I am back here in blogging, but literally, the one who I used to be is back. I met new people in my life and I am glad I could share my days, my thoughts, my heart to them. I got married to the man God made just for me. I got a new job, and I am blessed. Dreams, visions, and plans are active. I finally know what I want to do with my life, to keep living my purpose. I don’t look down on myself. I held to my identity in Christ. Even people will look down on me, I will get hurt but I get up believing that I am not who the people say I am. I am who God says I am. Every day is a challenge but I wake up hopeful, trusting that God is in control.

I still feel afraid sometimes, I am not perfect. But… God’s love gives me confidence. And I am forever grateful.

If you are experiencing depression, find help. You can also talk to me, I will not tell you what to do but to patiently listen. People who are depressed need people who know how to listen. The first step in overcoming depression is to believe that you are not alone.

Thank you for still reading up to this point. I appreciate it!







Are you a Good Servant?

Hello there! I hope everyone is doing well.

I am inspired to write something about the sermon tonight at worship service.

Our pastor mentioned three essential qualities or characteristics of a good servant of God:

  1. Sacrifice.

Boom! First big word – Sacrifice.

The first thing that comes in mind whenever I hear this word is killing. Okay, wait? Not really. Dying might be the word. It’s offering someone or something valuable to us in exchange for something worthy and important. It could be our time, people, something we really want or value the most.

“Are you willing to give up your life, your profession to serve God?”he asked.

Jesus sacrificed Himself for us.

Christ encourages you, and his love comforts you. God’s Spirit unites you, and you are concerned for others. Now make me completely happy! Live in harmony by showing love for each other. Be united in what you think, as if you were only one person. Don’t be jealous or proud, but be humble and consider others more important than yourselves. Care about them as much as you care about yourselves and think the same way that Christ Jesus thought:

Christ was truly God.
But he did not try to remain
    equal with God.
Instead he gave up everything
    and became a slave,
when he became
    like one of us.

Christ was humble.
He obeyed God
and even died
    on a cross.
Then God gave Christ
    the highest place
and honored his name
    above all others.

So at the name of Jesus
    everyone will bow down,
those in heaven, on earth,
    and under the earth.
And to the glory
    of God the Father
everyone will openly agree,
    “Jesus Christ is Lord!”

Hebrews 10:5-10

It is just simply amazing to think and realize how important we are in His sight. A GOD, a Master who is mindful of us. Jesus let go of His privilege, His glory in Heaven for you and me.

Our pastor encourages us not to be double minded. If you choose God, serve Him only. Go back to the origin in serving God. Deny yourself for Him. “ME” shouldn’t exist anymore. It’s all about Him.

2. Humility

He made Himself nothing.

Christ was humble.
He obeyed God
and even died
    on a cross.

Philippians 2:8

“Our pride is a hindrance to our service to God. Humble yourself to Him. Swallowing our pride is a sign of maturity.”

In fact, God treats us with even greater kindness, just as the Scriptures say,

“God opposes everyone
    who is proud,
but he is kind to everyone
    who is humble.”

James 4:6

3. Obedient

“Obedience is better than sacrifice”

“Tell me,” Samuel said. “Does the Lord really want sacrifices and offerings? No! He doesn’t want your sacrifices. He wants you to obey him.

1 Samuel 15: 22

Obey your parents – Read Proverbs 6:20

And this is love: that we walk in obedience to his commands. As you have heard from the beginning, his command is that you walk in love.

2 John 1:6

In John 10:27 : “My sheep know my voice, and I know them. They follow Me”

Personal thoughts:

Serving God is not a burden. Sometimes we spend more time on other things than listening to His voice. We don’t read His word where all the love and truth we are looking for is written. We browse Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, Twitter and all those time-consuming social media and sites instead of reading and meditating His word. We listen to heart breaking songs instead of worship songs. We don’t want to go to church because we have something ‘fun’ or ‘important’ to do than giving  HIm thanks and fellowshipping with our brothers and sisters in Christ. We don’t give our tithes and offering because we’re always short financially. While he gave us everything. Everything we need. 

If you will look around you, everyone is busy. Trying to achieve that heights of success. I wonder how God feels. Of course, He is happy if we have achievements, when we reach our goals. I am sure He celebrates with us during those times. But I wonder how God feels., when we don’t include him in our success? I am even hurting now thinking about it. I am not him but when I think about it, If I were him, it must be really painful.

The God who gave up everything just to save us, a Father who gave His only Son for the sins of many, the one who never stops loving us even though we don’t think about him as we should. The One who remains faithful even when we are unfaithful. The God who still sees you as beautiful even when you can’t see yourself as He sees you, a Friend who you can rely on, who can comfort you. He is the same GOD we sometimes or always set aside. An option.

It breaks my heart writing all these words. Do not get me wrong. I am not writing this to judge you or condemn you. I am also still under construction, letting God mold me, correct me, rebuke me and be that person He wants me to be. But let this be a reminder that God is still waiting for you, for me. It’s not too late to begin again. 

Forget about yourself, your status, your position and we can look at ourselves as fairly loved by the one true God, our Father in Heaven. As we keep going, seeking to prioritize Him, remind yourself that God is looking for humble people in His service. He wants our humility. To empty ourselves so we could be filled by Him. When we begin to be His follower, be aware of this and be reminded that Lucifer was a great worshiper. He was deceived by his own self. He thought that he can be as powerful as God. Let’s try our best not to be our old selves – who want to be always right, not wanting to be rebuked but instead wanting to be lifted up. God sees everything. Do everything in love and humility.

Obedience matters in our Christian life. And it is better than sacrifice. He accepts our offerings but God looks to our hearts. He is looking for the ones who follow His command. I like the last verse, John 10:27. “My sheep know my voice, and I know them. They follow Me.”

I want to be one of those who know His voice, the one who follows Him even if sometimes I do not understand why, just simply obey and trust His way. 

A good servant is someone who is willing to sacrifice something or someone in exchange for God”s presence, the one who humbled Himself to serve others. A good servant is obedient no matter what it takes, no matter the situation, throughout every season in life – good or bad, happy or sad. Someone who will still stand and say, “I love you, Lord”

Jesus is the best example of a good servant. He came to the world not to be served but to serve. Follow Him wholeheartedly.

God bless you.

Unexpected But Planned-Part 2

Unexpected But Planned Part 1 

I never thought I will be doing international ministry. I was only planning to join them and get some lessons and expectant for Gods revelations in my life. But I loved it when he calls you to do something impromptu, and yet it turned out great because you did it for Him, for His glory.

I and with some of the leaders of our church in Aruba attended a General Conference of Congregational Holiness Church, our mother church in Georgia. It was held in Gainesville, GA. God had been busy revealing many things to me. Excitingly, he let me see not only one state.

Places/State we went to:

  1. Gainesville, Georgia 
  2. Alabama
  3. Helen, Georgia – Anna Ruby Falls
  4. Cleveland, Georgia – Cabbage Patch Kids
  5. Atlanta, Georgia – Stone Mountain, Hyatt Regency


Our pastor, Ptr Roel Tangco was assigned to preach in CHC Alabama. It was a great experience. His wife and I were able to lead a worship song as well. Unexpected. God is so good, I love God’s surprises.


While on the road, I was in my thoughts. “God, you are amazing. I love doing things for you. I feel like I am fulfilling what I am called. Thank you for the opportunity!”

Does a good career will make you feel successful, fulfilled? I don’t think so. I heard this from my sister Queen when we talk about ministries “Success is doing what God wants you to do” You’ll only feel the satisfaction in your life if you know in your heart that you are doing what God wants you to do.

What a joy we have in Jesus.

God says, “I will use you mightily if you are willing. Make yourself available.”

We, churchmates from Aruba met the Pastor and wife from this church in Alabama

It was a great Sunday Worship Service.

Helen, Georgia

            Anna Ruby Falls

They didn’t only bring us to the conference for the spritual matter, they brought us also to some places to see attractions. God bless them. We went to Anna Ruby Falls. Nice View 🙂IMG_2786

Sorry for my chubby face and body. I love myself HAHA

While walking going to the water falls, God reminded me of His Word.

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters. He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name’s sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.

Psalm 23

I will never lack anything because God is my provider. The green trees remind me of His peace in my darkest days. He never let me fall, he chases me all the time and when I tend to go the wrong way, the other way, he never let me get lost. The woods represent the distraction in our life, we may go in a different way but He will show the path right back to His presence, secured, loved, peaceful, where I belong. He corrects me and teaches me, it may be a hard discipline but He does that to mold me, to make me a better one.

“Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life”

Cleveland, Georgia

              Cabbage Patch Kids

A doll in a cabbage. It’s cool how this attraction was created. Read the Legend of the Cabbage Patch Kids on their official site. But really dolls here are for sale, they are actually adopted by people. When you buy, they will give you baby’s birth certificate. It is a perfect place for babies and kids who want to adopt a baby doll.




Are you ready to visit the babies in this hospital? Hehe


Who wants to adopt this little one? HAHA



The babies move up and down. Hihi cutie!



It’s so good to be young, huh? Should I get one for me?


I think I will try to make my own baby first, and adopt one day? What do you think?


My School Bus is waiting… Say bye Dora! Next destination…HAHA


Atlanta, Georgia

          Stone Mountain






Yung sculpture talaga ang kinukuhanan dito e…Nag-focus lang sa akin!hehe 


       Georgia – Peach Market/Farm

Georgia is known as Peach State. We went here just to have some fresh peach ice cream. They also sell strawberries, apples etc. I was just focused on peach, I wasn’t able to check other products they have. But what good about here is, they’re fresh.


Peach Ice cream!!!!!

First time to see an apple tree. Thank you, Jesus! Happy kid..


There’s a store there who sells this stuff, I love rustic!

Gainesville, Georgia

               Free Chapel Worship Center

Attended Worship Service at Free Chapel. They are amazing! It’s my second time seeing Pastor Jentezen Franklin, an American pastor, author and can be seen on television too. He is the senior Pastor of Free Chapel Worship Center. He is a great preacher.


It was Father’s day when we attended the service. He encouraged the fathers to be a Man of Word, a man that obeys His Word so they could be a good example for their children. Truly, that the Word, the Bible is the lamp unto our feet and a light unto our path. Love his heart. God bless him!



With our church leaders and pastors


This experience was a blast! I  thank God for everything. God is so good. When God plans, it is always the best. One thing I am challenged to do, expect more from HIM. He is a great God! HE can do great things. Dare to believe!

Thank you for reading!




Unexpected but Planned

Enjoy today! Rejoice for the Lord rejoices with you. Do not worry about others opinions. You are highly favored and so loved by the Highest.  6:41 am, Friday, June 9, 2017


I stood up and stayed on the balcony for a while. My tears suddenly fell and whispered, “Thank you, Jesus, for your love is amazing.” Looking from our hotel room, the view was nice. I got to see buildings, they’re huge and tall. The sound of a busy road, vehicles driving in the city. I liked it. And I loved the fact that even we had struggled, at some point in our lives we almost given up but God reminds us that He can make impossible things possible.

U.S.A Experience. Unexpected but planned by God. In every state or place, we went to, He was revealing something to me. I love how God spoke to me through these events:

Atlanta, Georgia

Would you believe? I don’t really have the budget for a luxurious vacation or something. Never had I imagine to travel this year. I prayed for unexpected blessings but I didn’t plan to go out of the country because if I would only look at my finances, never in the world I could possibly fly anywhere.

But God is GOD! His works are astounding. I know in my heart that during those times I suffered from extreme sadness and depression, one day I would understand why things happened. There must be something from it. I was hopeful for God’s revelations. HE did it again! And here I come, Georgia.

Stayed in a very beautiful hotel, Hyatt Regency Atlanta. I together with our Pastor and leaders had experienced a quick fancy 1 night and 2 days in Hyatt. What a favor. It’s free for me. Here’s the secret: if you are an employee at any Hyatt Hotel, you’ll have a free stay for three days (as much as I know) in other countries. That’s one of their benefits. Isn’t it cool? I love that! It makes me want to work in Hyatt. Two among us work at Hyatt Aruba so we had two rooms checked-in.

God is good.

A big martini glass? 🙂 Hyatt Regency Lobby





God has already planned it. He knew that I will be needing this vacation. And I am thankful. It was so great to see buildings, honestly. I’ve been living in Aruba for almost six years now, all I can see there are beaches and small establishments. It’s a small island so you won’t see huge buildings. Nevertheless, Aruba is a very beautiful island. But it is good to see something new, right?

I missed the kind of noise, wide and busy roads and view in the city sometimes. It was a big deal for me to have experienced this.

Unexpected but Planned. Planned by God. He provides.

Five Star Hotel stay isn’t for rich ones only. It’s also for God’s princess who cannot afford. God provides, always.

Gainesville, Georgia


             2017 Congregational Holiness Church General Conference

Few weeks before the flight, I had a call from my mom asking me if I want to come over and visit. Of course, I would love that. I did join the group first from our church, attended the conference for few days. The trip is not for a luxurious vacation, by the way, we were just blessed to have stayed in a gorgeous hotel for few days in Atlanta.

The next day, we were picked up from the hotel to go to Gainesville where we will stay for the next days. It’s like almost two hours drive.

We stayed in Union Grove Campground, Gainesville, Georgia. We have met pastors and church leaders from different states and countries. We are all under Congregation Holiness Church. It’s really a blessing to see their dedication to the Lord and to the ministry. They are doing great to share God to people and I am really blessed by their lives.

God has revealed a lot of things to me during this stay.


My heart was melted and I was really inspired by these people. I honestly cried at nights during our stay at the campsite. God has been speaking to me and this experience is one of the confirmations I am asking for.

They are not young anymore but their diligence and dedication inspired me so much. Regardless of their age, they are doing their best, going on the mission trips, serving the people, cook food for the delegates from different countries, driving from here to there to let us see some places. And.. wow! HOURS of driving. Not to mention all the countries and mission they went to just to spread the Gospel. It’s just WOW! How dedicated they are.

And I will repeat, they are not young anymore. I don’t know how they do that but I was really shocked. For them, it’s normal. but for me, It really touched my heart how these wonderful people of God exert efforts and strength for the ministry, for God. My point here is, they are very serious about their ministry and it encourages so much that I desire to be like them. I have all the strength, I can still walk fast and do things or heavy ones to support a ministry, but I sometimes get tired easily, discouraged easily. Look at them, they are awesome, giving their time, their lives to serve people and to serve God.

Wow! How and why do they do that? The answer. LOVE. They love God so much that God poured out His love towards them and leads them to love people. Loving God, loving people.


The conference was held in CHC, New Haven Church


Thoughts like “Lord, what am I doing in my life? Why am I not sharing your love to people? I have all the strength, I am not old yet. I can still do things, but I always have excuses” I am a worship leader at our church, I attend youth groups, Bible study and teach kids tambourine dance. But I feel like God is speaking to me to do more, I don’t know exactly (or maybe I know, I am just stubborn) I’ve been praying for God’s direction in my life. I am not asking for a luxurious life. I just want God’s will in my life because I know how it feels when I give joy to the Lord, it is my strength. We are created by Him and for HIM. God is asking more from us because HE has more for us.

The conference helped me so much to see and be reminded once again our purpose. Make Jesus known. Go and share Him. Their hearts impressed me so much. Like.. really! Regardless of their age, they enthusiastically served people and dedicated their lives to the ministry.

I admired one of the pastors I’ve met there, Rev. JD Sosebee. (the man in the picture wearing sunglasses! Cool!) He’s very cheerful and anointed. He drove from Houston to Georgia. 13 hours drive. Imagine that? wew! Quite a long drive huh. I do understand that it is normal for them to drive this long from state to state. I do understand that but I still admire him and others who diligently meeting up, fellowshipping with one another to glorify our King. I am simply amazed. Most of the time, we,  the group from Aruba would be riding in his van. We laughed all the time. It was fun, indeed. And the sweetest thing I observed from him is from time to time, he calls his wife and shared what was happening in the conference, he talked about the people he met and say encouraging words. He still shares his thoughts and God’s revelations to her wife. And I melt. That was sweet. I would imagine myself and my future husband talking about God’s goodness and faithfulness every single day. Such an inspiration!

I also met Mrs. Cecilia from Africa. She’s sweet, we talked about God’s faithfulness in our lives and I also asked questions like how is it living in Africa, is it really difficult? I know that it is not as rich as America, she confirmed. But I admire her more when I asked her “If you are to choose, where do you want to live? Here in America or Africa?” Africa, where her family is, she answered. She is very humble and content. She’s happy serving God and her family in Africa. It’s all well to her knowing Jesus is their everything. We also laughed about things, how African could be really funny like “Emmanuela” (Anyone of you understand Emanuela’s humor? I do. Thinking about her now makes me wanna laugh. HAHA I love her!)

This event has become an eye-opener to me. They inspire me to do better and more for the Lord, what it really means to have a servant’s heart and to follow HIM wholeheartedly.

What saddened me is… There were few young people there. I looked around and I can count on a hand. Who would be the next to continue the ministry? Who would share Jesus with people? And that is a wake-up call for me. What am I doing in my life? I’ve been praying to God to show me what He wanted me to do. If this is His answer, I would love to have that courage to do His will. If I am called for a mission, I would love to be equipped and be knowledgeable so He can use me. I don’t know where to start, what to do but I have the desire. It’s up to me now to do something.

Unexpected but God already planned this. He wants me to see what joy it could bring to Him if we do share Him to people. He blessed us so he wants us to be a blessing as well.

“God must be really wanting me to know that there is joy in serving HIM. If I am looking for joy and peace in my life. Serve Him wholeheartedly.”

God never stopped proving me that I am a princess. From finances to wisdom, revelations, and realizations, he opened my eyes. He opens a door that no one can shut, he shut doors that no one can open. He does great things! And He truly speaks. I could loudly hear Him telling me how much he loves me and gives me the joy. And that JOY that I am looking and searching for can only be found in Him and in serving HIM.

A Christian life is never an easy journey. We will experience ups and downs, joy and pain most of the time hardships, trials not to break us but make us stronger. But this journey is very fulfilling and satisfying. I want to look forward on that day I will have the courage to do the things God wants me to do. I know I am called to greatness because He said so. I should stop thinking about all the negatives in me and in my life and begin to see how the Lord mold me and wanting me to be used in His Kingdom. It is a privilege to be called His daughter, His princess.

Unexpected events but they were already planned by my King, my Daddy in Heaven.

***I have so much more to share with you. I will stop here, will post more soon. Thank you for your time reading my post. I really do appreciate it. ‘Til next time.




“Why Me?” Or should I ask “Why not Me?”

It’s been a while, I know. I haven’t been writing on my blog these past few months. Well, who would notice, anyway? My last post was about getting myself back on track. I wrote an open letter for Princess, myself. It’s kind of connected with this post.


“Why Me?” “Why are you sending me here?” Why am I even here?” Living in Aruba for quite some years, the Lord might be tired of hearing me asking these questions to HIm? As if they weren’t answered. I can tell that God reveals His answers but sometimes I am just busy thinking about the situation without even realizing He’s been answering all this time. If only I take my time listening and hearing His voice instead of complaining and murmuring about the circumstances.


“Why Me?” I heard this again today from the missionaries we’ve met in the ship called LOGOS HOPE. It is a non-profit organization, international ship which brings knowledge and hope through literature. They sell books and at the same time ministering to people by their kindness and care to the people coming in the ship. You won’t only be happy by all the books in the library but also by their genuine and pure hearts that inspires me to keep believing and seeking God. Their passion in sharing hope and love of God is very exhilarating.


I’ve heard about it a long time ago but I didn’t have a chance to visit the ship. It visited Philippines, I believe. But I wasn’t able to go. Logos Hope was here in Aruba 7 years ago and I wasn’t here yet that time. Last April 21 up to today, May 7 they’re here in the island. And I am really blessed to have experienced the uplifting ambiance and admiring hospitality of the crew members. I needed this for all the seeking and healing process I’m going through. God just really know how to comfort me. Just in time, never early and never been late. Perfect timing.


I went in the ship like five or six times since they arrived in Aruba. I bought some books and they are not expensive. Thank God!  The first day I went, I was really really let me repeat again.. REALLY in awe. Looking around, observing every single crew in there doing their task for this ministry melt my heart once again. They are not paid. They are volunteers who gave their time and efforts, their lives for the Lord, following their calling in their lives and doing the will of God – sharing the good news. There are 400 or more crew members in the ship. Different nationalities and culture. They are meeting the world in the ship, actually. Isn’t it fascinating how God unite these people together with different languages and yet they have the common understanding that makes them united. JESUS. The love of God for them and for the people.


I think it is one of the bravest thing to do in one’s life. Leaving your family, love ones and your career behind for the sake of following Christ. Some of them are professionals but they left their  good jobs because they are called to seek the One and be the light to the World. They don’t think about the position but they have the hearts for service. A heart of a servant. They are doing what God’s will is. – to go and share the Gospel. These people are doing the right thing. Selflessly obeying God in their lives. Who wouldn’t melt their hearts towards these people?


“Why Me?” There will be times they will ask God why they are sent there. They are humans too. They feel sadness and loneliness as well. Homesickness will be very overwhelming for sure. But they are holding to God’s promises. They still find peace and joy. The more they feel it the more they run to the Lord which makes them more closer to Him. God’s revelations and wisdom are very active to their lives because all they do is to seek God in their lives while staying in the ship. They have personal and group devotions, worship times, lessons, Bible studies and discipleship lessons. And I love all these things.


One of the crew members is having a hard time ( I think everyone over there experience this) she was tired and sad, she went to the prayer room,grab her guitar, cried out and ask God, “Why Me?” She can’t speak English so well, She just started learning for nine months now. One of the requirements if you want to participate with them is  you can at least understand and speak English at a reasonable level.  God still sends her there, anyway. For the reasons? I don’t know why.  I’m sure that this is her training ground for more greater things in her life. And after days of crying to God, HE sent someone for her to be her teacher in English. They are now like sisters, caring for each other, building each other up. And yeah.. she is doing great because she can actually converse with other person now. When God calls you, HE will enable you.


Listening to their stories makes me ask a different question this time. “Why not me?” I admire them so much. Their courage and for being brave are inspiring. The third time I was in the ship, we attended a prayer event called “Pray for the Nation” we prayed for some unreachable countries like North Korea, Venezuela and more to open doors of opportunities to share the good news. We also prayed for what the world is going through like poverty, addiction, slavery, human trafficking etc. that people would know that there is hope in life. JESUS is the answer. He is the only one who can heal us within. And after the event, we got home and all. I was about to sleep, turned off my lights, but my heart is still overwhelmed. I prayed and I cried so hard like a baby on my bed. I needed this. I needed that moment. I missed that time where my heart’s only desire is to obey Him , to seek Him and to love Him. I was like a baby crying and telling him everything I feel. I felt so bad for not doing anything for His kingdom, I felt so sorry for not loving the lost anymore, I sobbed for I know God is calling me to do His will but I am to stubborn. I only look on my ugly situation, I only care about myself. While others are suffering and dying from starving, from the abuse of the evil, children are being forced to work for some countries, little ones who can’t see the beauty of life because they are abused, people who are broken and don’t see their worth so they end up hurting themselves, found their happiness in the wrong ones like pornography, smoking and alcohol and drug  addiction, shopping and everything they think will complete them. They are lost. And what am I doing? I live in fear, no confidence to speak about the truth, keeping to myself. Am I being selfish? I know the goodness of God. But I wasn’t on my self these years, I cried all the time to seek and know what was this thing that He wanted me to do. There is something inside of me that I know He wants me to share , to get out on my shell and see the world and do something..


“Why Not Me?” I want to be part of this ministry. Who wouldn’t like? But is this something God wants or just me? I prayed and told Him wherever I go, I want to be a channel of His blessings. I will speak what He says, I will go where He goes. At the end of my prayer  “I want to be with you” I want to know you more” ” I want to do your will” It doesn’t need to be in Logos Hope. All I want is to be with you. I was lost and weak because I didn’t want to follow Him, I lost my motivation because I only look at myself. But these days since I came to that amazing ship, God has been talking to me,  God has been shaking me and getting me back on track. He’s revealing me His words and promises to me “Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” Psalms 37:4


I believe that everyone is called for a specific task in this life. It’s just a matter of obedience. If it’s God”s will for me to be in the ship one day, it’ll happen and he will give me confirmation through His word, prayers, from the people around me. Just like one of the staff in the ship told us. For the meantime, while living in Aruba with a different culture and language, I have to know and seek my purpose here. I am sure that I am not only here for work. He’s been telling me to do something but I still didn’t. I pray and you can also pray for/with me that the Lord will give me the courage to do His will in this island.


I can say that the island is so beautiful. Life in here is easy and relaxing. Some Filipinos call this place as milk and honey place where abundance is present everywhere. I am thankful and grateful for that but life isn’t all about it. Aruba is called One Happy Island. Like what I have said I am grateful for the opportunity to be able to enjoy the beauty of God’s creation. But for me, this is also called “Temptation Island” where everybody is busy making money, making life very comfortable, relaxing, bars everywhere, prostitution in a certain place which is legal here. It is very comfortable that not everyone is willing to take time to gather for the name of the Lord. I honestly got used of being relaxed. But in my heart I know that this isn’t life for me. I want to see people , Christians who are willing to give their time for the work of the Lord, who can really take time teaching people about the knowledge of God, who worship God in Spirit &truth not a performance, I want to see a generation in this island who seek God and knows God’s holiness. IF I want to see it, I must begin to be one.


“Why me?” shouldn’t be ask this time. Should I ask “Why not me?” If God can use those missionaries in the ship mightily because they are willing and made themselves available? Why not me?” It doesn’t have to be in the ship. If God calls you, he will enable you. It would be great if one day I can participate with them but now my mission field is in Aruba. A revelation that God has been telling me that didn’t get in to me until Logos Hope arrived. Thank you so much for this ministry. You guys are amazing Logos Hope!! 🙂

Embrace the Place Where You Are

Do you know someone who is not happy with where he or she is in life? She is frustrated because she is not married, and her internal body clock is sounding an alarm. Or he is upset because somebody is not treating him fairly on his career path. They are constantly worried, trying to reason things out, trying to change things that only God can change.

I believe that we created much of our own unhappiness and frustration by constantly resisting and fighting against situations and circumstances occurring in our lives. We don’t understand why our prayers aren’t being answered, why things aren’t changing sooner. “Why has this happened to me?” Consequently. we live with unrest and uneasiness on the inside.

Learn to relax and accept the place where you are. Admittedly, it may not be a great place right now. We all have things we want to see changed, things we want to happen sooner. If we really believe that God is in control and is directing our steps, then we must believe that we are exactly where are supposed to be. We needn’t be wrestling with life and resisting our circumstances all the time.

Yes, we should resist the enemy; we should resist sickness and other robbers of joy. Now, that doesn’t mean that every minute we must be fighting and struggling. Some people seem to wear themselves out, constantly praying, resisting and rebuking. They beg, “Please, God, you’ve got to change this situation. Change my husband. I don’t like my job. My child won’t do right.”

No turn all of that over to God. Your attitude should be: “God, I’m trusting You. I know that You are in control of my life. I may not understand everything that is happening, but I believe You have my best interests at heart. I’m not going to go around resisting and struggling. I’m going to relax and enjoy my life.” Friend, if you can sincerely pray such a prayer, it can take an enormous amount of pressure off you.

The Bible says to “Be still, and know that I am God.” Notice, you need to get still. You need to be at peace with where you are right now. Things may not be perfect. You may have some areas in which you need to improve. But as long as you are living with worry and stress, you are trying the hands of Almighty God. If you could get to a place of peace, God could fight your battles for you. He can turn your negative situations around and use them for good.

Scripture records, “Those who have believed enter in to the rest of God.”Being in God’s rest means that although you may have a problem, you trust Him to take care of it. It means that you may have a situation that you don’t understand, but you are constantly trying to figure out. It means you have a dream in your heart, but you are not in a hurry, you’re not frustrated because it hasn’t come to fruition yet. In other words, when you are really in God’s rest, you know that God has you in the palm of His hand. No matter where you are, you accept it as the place God wants you to be.

I’m not saying that God wants you to stay there, but if you are truly trusting Him, if you believe He is in control, then wherever you are — in either good circumstances or bad –that is where you are supposed to be. Maybe something unfair has happened; maybe somebody is not treating you the right, or you are struggling financially. Still, that doesn’t give you the right to live upset and frustrated.

We have to understand that God has promised He will use whatever comes into our lives for good. He will use the difficulty to do a work in you. What are you facing currently may not be good, but if you’ll keep the right attitude, He’ll use it for your good.

**This is an excerpt from Joel Osteen’s book, Become a Better You: 7 Keys to Improving Your Life Every Day.

Worship even when you don’t feel like doing it.

It is such a privilege to be part of God’s ministry. As a worship leader, there were times I just simply don’t want to do it but I still do it. It’s not about how I feel but it is about who God is. He deserves to be adored so no matter how I feel, no matter what my situation is, I will still worship the ONE who deserves all the glory. I do not want to sound religious. I have my flaws too. But in this writing, I want to you to be encouraged as much as it encourages me whenever life seems all a mess. whenever I feel I am not doing the right thing and my best. It is not enough to just sing

I remember my mentor when I was younger. I was assigned to worship lead at our church for the next Sunday. Everything in my life was a mess that time and I asked her if he can help me find someone to replace me to lead on Sunday. She asked me why, and there I did tell her all the drama in my life. It’s not that bad, I just don’t feel doing it. She is very strict but loving person. She then answered me after telling the story “Is that the way you should serve your God?” And I answered “I do not want to transfer the spirit I have right now to the team because I am not really okay?” “Oh, so whenever you are not okay, God shouldn’t be worshiped? Is that what you meant?” I understood it and my tears kept falling.

God will remain God no matter what. No matter the situation is, whether you are okay or not, God is a God who deserve our worship. We should have a heart like that. Even things are not going well, we should still choose to adore HIM. There are so much reasons to give Him the glory in our life. I do not want to sound that my life is perfect. I actually don’t have. If I have to tell everything in here, you will be spending hours and hours reading. Everyone has problems and it only comes in different forms. But what makes it difference is the way we handle and face them.

I will always have problems, that’s what I believe. There will always be times that I will just lie on my bed, cry my eyes out and with so much pain. In the midst of adversity, God is wanting us to do the best thing. You know what the best thing is? Worship. God’s presence will always be the best place to hide when you do not know how to handle things. In seconds, 5 minutes, 10 minutes being in His arms, soaking yourself to His Word, praying, singing praises, thanking God for all He has done to you, counting all the blessings and all, is better than thousand years. It changes everything. It changes your view in life, your terrible feelings and loneliness suddenly turn to positive and wonderful feeling. Let me say God’s presence is everything. Jesus is everything we need.

I am not good of explaining things theologically, but really.. His presence is life to me. It’s amazing to have experienced this, it’s privilege, it’s an honor. I forget things that worry me, I forget the pain, I forget the struggle in just few seconds or minutes as soon as I know God is covering me with his love. Knowing how he really loves me changes the way I look at things.

 The social media is a big destruction to our relationship with Him. When I found myself browsing and scrolling my Facebook, Instagram and others for hours, I had to stop and tell myself “Stop scrolling, Read your Bible” I am not saying I am a person who read the Bible all the time consistently. I just understand that His word is a lamp to our feet. A perfect guide and light unto our path according to Psalm. And it is really true. So whenever you feel that your path is not the direction you should be taking in, remind yourself God wants to direct your path. Reading His word is a step of knowing him more, finding him and loving him.

I am still one of the people who want to know more about Him and I am still in the process. I am under construction, letting my architect to design me. I am the passenger wherein I let the driver take over my life. It is more about trusting Him. I might not understand everything that has been happening in my life right now but what I am sure of is God never changes. He remains faithful. He loves me for who I am. My situation doesn’t define me, I will believe what God says who I am. I am beautiful, I am precious and I am a victor. My success  doesn’t define the way the world define it. My treasure and my success is in God. It’s in His presence. It’s in my worship towards Him I truly belong. IN HIM alone.

“Is this the way I serve God?” I  will ask myself this question whenever I don’t feel coming to him, whether I don’t feel thanking Him and whether I don’t feel worshiping Him. Because the question will always remind me whenever I see myself not doing my best to the ONE who created me, I am missing something. HE deserves more than anything else in this world. HE is my God, the one who loves, forgives, rescues, comforts, corrects, accepts and adores me, the only One who can touch my heart so deep. How could I not give my best? He deserves our everything. He wants our heart. Give your heart and do your best.

Worship even when you are sad, even when you do not have a job, even you have financial problems, even when you are in pain. Worship. God remains God no matter what and He deserves our adoration. 🙂



How Does Encouragement Affect Us?

“How does it feel when you are encouraged by someone? Do you usually take advises in a positive way or you feel uncomfortable when you are being encouraged by someone?” Kuya Monjhet asked each of us this question during our small group devotion. We gathered every Friday to listen to God’s word, we worship, we bond, we eat and we laugh. Fellowship. This is how we get our strength from the whole week of stress from work, and or school, at home and all. We all have the tendency to be preoccupied with the busyness of the world but we try to meet once a week to build each other up.

Some of the answers are:

“I feel special. It feels good because you feel you are loved”

 “I don’t usually get some encouragement from people besides from my sisters and mom, maybe because people think I am just fine, I joke around all the time. They do not know what I am going through but it always feels good when someone encourage you, it gives you strength”

“I am good at encouraging others but when someone encourage me, it doesn’t get within me”

“During the time I was really down, someone encouraged me and it helps me to keep going and not to give up.”

It feels better!

“I want to give up, I want to die! I just can’t take this anymore” 

Did you ever say this to your self or ever feel this way? I did. I would not deny that there were times in my younger years. I release these words and thoughts did run to my head. I thought that I could not make it, I thought it was the end and would not able to keep going because of trials, pains and sufferings I was going through. Everybody has different kinds of difficulties. For others, it’s not that hard but for others it is. But one thing is for sure, there is a cry inside that we want to be understood somehow.

People nowadays seek attention through social media. I have no problem with them posting different stuff marketing themselves.  I also do selfies and cover songs, though! 🙂 So this is not to judge anyone. But most of them who shared lengthy and dramatic posts problems about their family, love life and all, are mostly the ones who need to be encouraged, seeking for someone to understand. Selfies are also way of people wants to be noticed. Everyone seeks attention and affection. They want to be accepted and appreciated.

When someone takes time to listen and give you words of wisdom during troubles, it makes you feel better, special and loved. I also felt this, I do not seek advises or comfort from anyone, because to tell you the truth I am so good in covering myself by smiling and laughing. It confirmed when a missionary discerned me that I was going through hard time but I am so good in covering it. So, yeah! That is me. But believe me, encouragement like that penetrates deep inside my heart.

Good thing about encouragement, it always makes you feel better. So what are you waiting for? Find someone now who needs your simple words like “I care for you”. “I appreciate you” “Whatever you are going through, remember I will always be here” “I believe in you, you can make this” and more.

It pushes you beyond your limit.

Encouragement doesn’t only give you the feeling of being loved and special but it also pushes you to do greater. When someone believes in you, you start to feel confident. If you do not trust yourself and yet there are people around you trust you, it gives you the courage to go beyond your limit.

Hebrews 3:13 New King James Version (NKJV)

13 but exhort one another daily, while it is called “Today,” lest any of you be hardened through the deceitfulness of sin

Exhort means to strongly encourage or urge someone to do something. The Bible tells us to do it daily to one another. Why? Nowadays, as we can see, the enemy is trying to give us the life that we think the best for us. Clubs and bars are full while churches are empty. What do you do when your friend is choosing the other way instead of running towards God when in pain or downcast?

We are reminded to urge someone to be in God’s love all the time. The world offers great things in our eyes but we still lack of peace, joy and sometimes or all the time we feel left out or alone. As brothers and sisters in Christ, never stop encouraging someone. That is the best thing we can do to help us grow together in the knowledge of the Lord. The peace we are all looking for is in Christ Jesus alone.

It pushes you beyond your limit. Okay, before I became a worship leader, there’s a lot of encouragements I had to receive to obey. I doubt myself, I was shy, I’m still shy now, but knowing about God’s grace that is sufficient in our every needs, through the push of God’s servants, I am still a worship leader. I thought I couldn’t make it and having thoughts like I am not really called by God to do this, I can only sing but not to lead.  But because someone encouraged me to use my gifts and talents for the Lord, I tried and it was not a bad decision. I realized that this is what I am called for. This task that I thought I could not able to do, I am still doing it by the grace of the Lord.

It gives hope

Encouragement doesn’t only give you the good feeling, pushes you to your limit and beyond but it also gives you hope. If you think that there is no other way but to just simply finish your life, you are so wrong. I encourage you to speak over your life and to others. It is true when you are still alive, there is still hope. You will find hope in God.

Why is it important to encourage someone? There are people today who are giving up with their life. A simple word or action to show them that there is hope will give someone the courage and trust to keep going and have an expectations of greater things.

I admit, sometimes I enjoy the negative thoughts in a way by dwelling on them the whole time. But it is the work of the enemy to destroy us. It is not from the Lord. There is hope in those who believe in God.

Psalm 146:11

..the LORD delights in those who fear him, who put their hope in his unfailing love.

It motivates and disciplines

I really wanted to learn how to play piano. I am not good in playing but I can play to accompany my singing, the basics. I was told to keep practicing until you really say you can play it. Motivation and determination are some of the factors to make things happened. You are also responsible to encourage your own self. Just like playing instrument if you are not gonna take a step to learn, how are you gonna able to do it?

“What do you want to do with your life?”

“I want to be a writer”

“Oh, Nice. Do you write?”

“No, because I don’t know how to”

“You want to be a writer? Then write”

There are so many ways to learn. You just have to begin. I think everyone starts from the bottom, so you better start to do what you love to do. I write not to be praised. I write because I love to write, whether I am good or not, it doesn’t matter. I finally figure that out. Beginner will always have doubt and for us to be on that higher level, we need motivation, determination and discipline. Easier said than done, huh? I know, right. But this is also note to myself. I am not saying that I am perfectly confident in my life. Of course not, if you only know how I struggle with self-confidence. But through God’s grace, I will able to do this, right? 🙂 Encourage me now.. HAHA

When someone is encouraging you it motivates you, right? So if you ever feel motivated by someone, pay it forward. You know how encouragement can change a person’s life. 🙂

It nurtures patience and kindness

I was so impatient with myself. There are traits in me that I wanted to change instantly. So, the tendency, I got frustrated and depressed. I look down on myself and because of that, I won’t able to do a task perfectly. Do not be hard on yourself. God is patient to us, you should be too. God wants us to practice kindness to others, but also to ourselves. It is difficult for us to be kind if we are not kind to ourselves. So, through God’s grace, I am able to love and be kind to myself, believing that God created me for something better and can do greater things.

Everybody has different trials in life. When someone is mean, I try to look through that person, the inside, something within him/her. Maybe she/he has a hard time in some areas of her/his life. I am thankful to my friends who are so patient with me. I used to complain so much about my life but having people around you who never stop inspiring you and praying for you is awesome. I am blessed. It made me patient to others needs as well. Their encouragement goes within me because you know that they love you as you are, when you make mistakes, they are not gonna look down on you but they are understanding and take time to really understand how I feel. Life is learning. Everything happens for a purpose, whatever the purpose is, be open to know by running to God’s arms. His word to penetrate within us and cultivate a good heart.

Romans 15:4New King James Version (NKJV)

For whatever things were written before were written for our learning, that we through the patience and comfort of the Scriptures might have hope.

Helps you grow in Christ

Last two weeks ago, we are also reminded to make this our goal to our group. We all know that we are not perfect but God want us to build each other up. When someone is down, pull him/her up. Do not judge. Love and encourage them. A simple “How are you?” and “How can I pray for you?” can really make a change in one’s life. When I am down, God sends people to do that to me, I am grateful. Knowing that God sees everything and he wants us also to look after our neighbors and family in Christ, to pray for them.

English Standard Version

1 Thessalonians 5:11
Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.

You are not alone!

Lastly, Remember that! God is there with you, God’s servant are also willing to be there to the people in need. When you encourage someone, that person feels he/she is not alone same as you feel when you are being encouraged. You need them. They need you.

John 13:34-35New King James Version (NKJV)

34 A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another. 35 By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.”

Let us love one another. God, as our father will really be happy seeing his children loving each other. Encourage them. When you think that there is someone around you needs yous simple smile. Do it.

SMILE! Give them hug! and Pray for them! 🙂


Friday Group


The Program:

We worship before we start, we sing “Great are you Lord”

Opening Prayer

Devotion Topic: Encouragement

And after.. we played 7up . Shagiddy shagiddy shapopo (idk if I spelled it right ! HAHA)

We had a good laugh! Thank God 🙂

The one handling the guitar is so pogi.. HAHA



“When you worship Me, they will hear Me”

You know I was so blessed to hear you worshiping. Hear you singing, just loving God. And i believe that God will anoint you more and more. I dont know what your heart desire is. I just wanna sing over you. I know that God… You know the father says even the father sings over us, he dances over us with joy, he sings over us. See, we sing a lot , we hear a lot about the song of the lord. We hear a lot about the song of a bride. The song the bride groom, see, God sings over us. You have prophecy like just people speak it, we have prophesy that is sung. And God has given me the grace and anointing to sing over people and just to release the word of God over their lives and to see a song being sung is so powerful. And its awesome when God sings. I love praise and worship. I love it. But to be honest with you. It is wonderul to sing song. But I always wait when the prophetic song kicks in then the Spirit begins to sing. Its not our song anymore. Its not our music anymore. Its not our words anymore. But it is His song and his words. We must always come to a place in praise and worship when God begins to sing. And those songs will touch people’s lives. I’d love to sing ‘Lord I gve you my heart, i give you my soul..i live for you alone. Evry breath that I take every moment im awake, lord have your way in me’ it is wonderful to sing. Songs that has been written by men but when God to sing over us and we God begins to sing like:

When you give your life to ME, when you surrender it all, I will use you the way the best I can. I will anoint your hands, I will anoint you. I will let my anointing flow. Surrender yourself to Me as you worship Me, I will touch your heart and your life. I will make known Myself to you, I will speak to you, just surrender yourself to Me, your life, your heart, your eyes, your hands, your feet, give it all to Me. I will set  you free. This is just the beginning, this is just the beginning, where I will speak to you and you will hear my voice and I will speak to you in many ways and when you hear my voice there will be a melody, songs from heaven will fill your heart and when you sing the song of the Lord, your heart and voice will beat as one as you sing the revelation of the Son. You release it with power and authority, the songs will be release with power and authority. It will set the captives free. Sing, sing a song of the Lord and don’t hold back. Sing the song of the Lord, don’t hold back. I will anoint you, I will anoint your voice more and more. It will not stop, it will not cease, it will grow as you worship Me in liberty, a freedom to fill the place, my glory will shine on your face. I am with you. I called you. I will anoint you. I will lead you and I will guide you. I will fill the songs in your mouth, I will fill it up with My words. Just worship Me in my presence. Just worship Me and you will see, it will touch many lives, it will talk to many lives when you worship Me. When you worship Me, they will hear Me, they will hear Me, they will hear Me.

“When you worship Me, they will hear Me”

From Psalmist Abraham Laisana

Conference: Prophetic Worship

Church of Zion

La Cabana Aruba

O4.17.2013 10:32pm

It was three years ago when I received these prophetic words from a psalmist named Abraham Laisina. He was from Netherlands and he was invited to be our guest speaker for the Praise and Worship Prophetic Conference held by Church of Zion Aruba. I remember someone recorded it from church, an mp3 file so I had the chance to listen to it and I wrote them down. He said those words to me in the form of singing. I was one of the worship leaders that night and because I am a shy type person (weh?) each time I lead, I got nervous. I’ve been leading for how many years but still I get anxious each time. It is His grace that I am able to stand up on stage. I was quietly praying to God before it starts, I asked him to simply flow in the room and to everyone’s heart and to me, of course. Here’s my prayer in secret “God, please show me if I am really called to do this, make me have that feeling of satisfation and joy as I do this service for you. Your will be done and may you found my heart pure before you” I love to sing. But just because someone can sing doesn’t mean you can be a worship leader. There is more to it and it’s accompanied by a great responsibility. Why? Because you are about to usher the people in the presence of God. For you to lead them, you yourself should be in his presence,soaking into His Word and prayer so you can worship Him in Spirit and in truth. For me, without sounding religious, worshiping God is everything to me. I just love to sing for Him. I might write more about it for future topics but today, I want to share this revelation that God has revealed to me.

I love to be in His presence. Words are not enough to express how great the feeling is when I am in His presence. It is life to me. Days before the conference, it had been in my thoughts and convictions that God wants me to surrender everything to Him so He can use me, to empty myself so He can fill me. I am longing for Him. He is the only one who can satisfy me. And when I worship, even I am in the midst of trials, pain and struggles I had the courage to keep going, to keep moving and believing that all things work together for good to those who love God.

“And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28

To tell you the truth, I have nothing to boast about my life. I don’t have riches in this world. But what I have is Jesus and that I can say I have my everything. I do not want to sound so holy or be called ‘holier than thou’ because I am not. I am imperfect, a sinner saved by His grace. But what I can boast about is the grace of God that overflows in my life. When I worship, either in the privacy of my room or in public, I found my self in a different state, seems everything is perfect. I can feel the deepest of peace where I cannot get from anyone or anything in this world. Nowadays when you look on social media, crimes, war and filthy things everywhere we can all see, and its depressing and heartbreaking. But with His promises, you can sleep peacefully and soundly and be assured that you are safe, not to worry too much because you know that He will hold you, guide you and protect you.

“For I the LORD thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee, Fear not; I will help thee.” Isaiah41:13

“You know what? I am blessed to hear you singing, to hear you worshiping Him, just simply loving God” Bro. Abraham came to me saying this line and started to prophesy. I don’t know. The las time I remember I was really pouring out my heart to God. I had to prepare my heart. I was so nervous and all I can say to God is to take over. “I don’t want to be seen here, I want your presence to flow through me, through the team, through the leaders and just simply use us for your revelation to people” I prayed.

When you are a worship leader, you sometimes forgot that the worship time is not your time. We are so worried about what we are going to say, our attire, about our voice, about the music and instruments, the quality of the sound etc. See what I prayed first “God, show me that I am called for this” It was selfish of me that I want to lead well instead of HIM be glorified. ‘Show me I am called for this’ is asking him to prove that he is calling you to do this and he has to accompany you as you lead. There is no problem about acknowledging HIm, that is my point actually but often time worship leaders are so worried about the outcome of the whole worship time.

But in the end of my every prayer. “Jesus it is not about me, about the songs, about the music, not about us, It is all about YOU” It is important that we check our hearts from time to time. It is not actually the quality of my voice that matters when I lead, it is about the content of my heart towards the Lord. Why are you singing? Is it because you have a good voice? Is it because everyone is in the team and you just wanted to join? Is it because it looks fun in the worship team? NO. You are there to worship GOD alone. Whether you are in the team or not, wherever you are, a true worshiper worships everywehere.Worship is not about singing or playing instruments. It is a lifestyle. Whatever you do that gives glory to Him is worship.

The fact that I have no strength to speak and to do things because I was so nervous. I let it go. I let God take over and I will simply focus my heart to HIM. It is His grace that flow to me so I would be able to do what he wants me to do. I know in my self that I cannot do it but because He told me to do it, I can make it because He strengthens me. When you are called by God to do a task, He will surely enable you. Just simply say “YES Lord, I will follow”with all your trust that He will guide you.

God gave me the grace to sing. And I want to use that for Him. We all do have God-given gifts, we have to use them for His glory.

Today, it was not an accident that I got to read my old journal, I believe. I was reminded about my purpose in life. At the present time, the world’s standard of living is so high and depressing. Everyone runs to the top of the world, they work hard to be in the highest rank of living. Money, fame and beauty, they worry about. There were times in my life that I got depressed seeing my batchmates having a good life, they travel, they have their own family, good carreer, house and lot, beautiful skin and faces etc. and I started to look down on myself. I feel terrible! But God’s word is so comforting and he rebuked me.

 For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?Mark 8:36

People may seem have a good and perfect life but God is looking to our hearts. He is more concern to our soul.

I thank God for he taught me how to be content and to keep fixing my eyes on Him so that all I can see everyday is beauty. He is wonderful and He created me in His own image. So, I am beautiful 🙂 right? HAHA

Bro. Abraham ended his encouragement in prayer for me:

Father, I thank you in Jesus name. Lord I release even the prophetic anointing. Lord the psalmist anointing. Lord that is even upon my life. Father, I release Lord the measure of that anointing. I impart, I release, Lord that she may sing the song of the Lord, she may declare the prophetic song without fear and without hesitation and with power and authority. It shall come forth like a river it’ll flow in Jesus name. In Jesus name. Amen

God spoke to me through Him. These are one of the days where I only want to be wrapped in His arms. Loving God is difficult, we fail most of the time but His love never changes, never fails and unending that challenges us to know him deeper. I needed a confirmation for what I have been praying for and there He goes, showing me this again. God is stirring my heart and I do not want to live not doing my purpose. God is calling everyone of us and He wants you as well. He wants your heart so he can freely move miracles in your life. Surrender yourself to Him.

“When you worship Me, they will hear Me” – GOD

Be a blessing!